Michael, generally an awesome dude, occasionally a tad cocky. But otherwise brilliant.

ixnay-on-the-oddk:

My idea of flirting is making fun of each other until one of us fucks up and says something nice.

spangefucker:

meatbicyclevevo:

somebody once told me the world was gonna

end on december 21, 2012. i bought all of this fucking pasta as a way to celebrate the end of the world and now i’m $10,000 in debt and i have pasta everywhere in my house

ottermatopoeia:

mattniskanenseyebrows:

OCTOBER IS NEXT WEEK

image

OCTOBER IS THIS WEEK
image

brinepools:

reasons I can relate to a possum:

-tired & unkempt
-emotions ranging from “displeased” to “existential scream”
-no work ethic
-lies around looking dead when overwhelmed
-will eat trash & live amongst trash if left to own devices
-sometimes you feel bad and feed it a sandwich

serenea:

I wish I was having sex in a tent right now.

Deep cover.

(Source: oldtrustylegs)

wounds-2-wisdom:

awwww-cute:

Am I doing this right?

*throws singles*

wounds-2-wisdom:

awwww-cute:

Am I doing this right?

*throws singles*

wonnderr-lusttt:

looow-tus:

undftdaniel:

defend-sissy-boy-emo:

jadelyn:

holypuckingcow:

abbysetcetera:

Adulthood doesn’t mean you stop drinking juice pouches and eating fruit snacks. It means buying your own. 

and mixing them with vodka

At 3 in the morning while marathoning your favorite show because nobody can tell you to go to bed.

And then regretting your decisions the next morning.

Because you have to work.

and make more money to buy fruit snacks and juice pouches.

and vodka

(Source: asexualarmin)

disneysnewgroove:

Disney movies in order of historical setting

(Excludes most of the package films. Some films, eg The Lion King, are impossible to pin down exactly and some, like Aladdin and Treasure Planet, are anachronistic, so these are estimations. A few have been split into 2 if there is more than one time period in the movie, and sequels have been put together.)